Saturday, August 24, 2013

REGLAR WIGLAR 2OTH ANNIVERSARY 1993-2013

From RW#4, 1994

THE HAIRY PATT BAND
Buford's Last Pusser (choke inc.)
 
Jason Drenik looks mad. When he's up there on that stage screamin' and a strummin', the boy looks mean mad. Mad enough to hurt somebody. Looks like he could jes up and bust somebody's head plum to squash. And he would if he had a might to. And Joe Patt, why that boy's crazier than a pack of coons in a creek. Crazy 'n' mean. Crazy 'n' mean an' scart to die. You can tell by the way he beats on them drums of his.

Jason and Joe, why they're the whole Hairy Patt band. A drummer and a geeter player from Columbus, Ohio. I seen 'em play a live show down there in Cincinnati about two-three weeks back. You can take it from me too, they're a sweaty, greezy, dirty, backwater, shit eatin', pickin' and a grinnin' grunge country rock band who like suckin' on melon, drinkin' with Granny and maybe killin' a feller if'n they git drunk an' angry enough.

Their CD, Bufford's Last Pusser is all about the stuff I just said. There's also a song on there called "Jack and Diane" and as near as I can figure, it's about two American kids growin' up in the Heartland. Seems like Jack, he wants to be a football star and Diane, she wants to be a debutante in the back of Jack's car. Sounds like somethin' that that John Cougar fellah would be writtin' a song about don't it? N'fact, he did write a song about it, but it ain't as angry and as mean mad as the Hairy Patt Band version.

Joe and Jason, they like crusty girls too 'cause they got a song called "Crusty" that goes: "I knew a girl/she was kind of a crusty girl/but that's OK 'cause that's what I like, I like 'em crusty." These boys are sure to get yah jumpin' and a-yellin with Bufford's Last Pusser. The cover is of some slobbery looking white trash breakfast gone wrong but probably looked oh so right after a night of hoochin' and koochin'. The whole thing is just sick enough to make it worth yer pennies. That's what folks like. Makes 'em feel swell—Scat-in-the-Hat

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